i didn't love you.
i love you still
in the present tense,
in the here and now
in this breath and the next
you are not gone from my heart
nor will you ever be.
just because the earth no longer
holds your body, doesn't mean
that our souls are not entwined.
we are mingling every day.
joined at the horizon of
this world and the next.
you weren't-- you are.
you didn't-- you do.
you can never be erased.
Ullie Kay
There will come a day
when you will glance
at your child
and be met by an adult.
and it will wipe the very floor
from under your feet
when you realize
in that moment
that you were only ever minding them
until they fly away.
because back then
when you were so consumed
with the daily grind of parenting
you felt like this was forever
yet we know
nothing is truly forever
just a handful of years
you will know them as a child
and if you are blessed
many more
you will know them as an adult
drink them in
if you can
drink them in
Donna Ashworth
A lot of us are in the last quarter of life and I share without politics, religion, race cards. Just gentle thoughts:
You know, time has a way of catching you off-guard about how quickly it travels.
It feels like just yesterday that I was young and ready to start adult-life. And in a way it feels like eons ago, and I wonder where the years have gone.
I know I lived them all.
I remember all my hopes and dreams. I remember the plans I made.
And suddenly, here I am in the last quarter.
How did I get here so fast?
Where have the years gone and where did my youth go?
I can recall looking at older people, thinking how long it will take for me to get where they are. That I am still in my youth, that I have many years ahead. At that time I could not even think of being where I am now.
And yet, here I am.
My friends are retired, they all have grey hair, they move much slower than they did and when I look at them, I see older people. Some are in a better and some a worse condition than me. But I see the big difference. They are no longer the youthful, carefree, full-of-life friends.
Just like me, age shows. And we are now the older people we used to look at and thought it was still a long way off.
I find that these days, taking a shower takes its toll on my breath and energy levels. And an afternoon nap is not just a treat, it’s become a necessity. And if I don’t, I find myself sleeping in the same chair I started reading or watching television in.
Now I have entered this new season of my life, totally unprepapred for the discomfort, aches and pains, loss of energy and strength and ability to do what I could, yet sometimes didn’t. At least I know that, even though I am in the last quarter and I have no idea how long this quarter will be, when my time on earth is over, a new adventure awaits too.
Yes, I do have things I wish I I had never done. Yet so thankful for those I did. It is all in a lifetime.
And if you are not in the last quarter yet, I want to remind you that it comes faster than you could anticipate. Do the things you still want to do as soon as possible. Do not procrastinate. Life runs on fast legs.
Do today what you can.
There is no promise that we will all see the seasons of life. Live for today. For now.
Say the words to the ones you love. Often.
Hopefully some will appreciate the things you did for them. And if they don’t, it is also okay.
Life is truly a gift. Just be happy. It is afterall your choice.
And remember that health is a treasure, not wealth, gold and silver, property or your bank balance.
You may think that going out is the best, but believe me – coming home is better.
You may forget names and that is okay, because some have already forgotten that they knew you.
The things you cared about previously, you may lose interest in.
If you fall asleep in your favourite chair, stay there.
Growing older is wonderful. It is comfortable. It is loaded with memories that you never grow tired of. It is an absolute treasure.
Look after yourself.
“Remember Me”
To the living, I am gone.
To the sorrowful, I will never return.
To the angry, I was cheated.
But to the happy, I am at peace.
And to the faithful, I have never left.
I cannot speak, but I can listen.
I cannot be seen, but I can be heard.
So as you stand upon a shore
gazing at a beautiful sea - Remember me.
As you look in awe at a mighty forest
and its grand majesty - Remember me.
As you look upon a flower and
admire its simplicity- Remember me.
Remember me in your heart:
Your thoughts, and your memories,
of the times we loved,
The times we cried,
The times we fought,
The times we laughed.
For if you always think of me, I will never be gone.
-Margaret Mead
What does it feel like to be old?
The other day, a young person asked me: - What did it feel like to be old?
I was very surprised by the question, since I did not consider myself old. When he saw my reaction, he was immediately embarrassed, but I explained that it was an interesting question. And after reflection, I concluded that getting old is a gift.
Sometimes I am surprised at the person who lives in my mirror. But I don't worry about those things for long. I wouldn't trade everything I have for a few less gray hairs and a flat stomach. I don't scold myself for not working out , or for eating a few extra "little things." I am within my rights to be a little messy, to be extravagant, and to spend hours staring at my flowers.
I have seen some dear friends leave this world, before they had enjoyed the freedom that comes with growing old.
-Who cares if I choose to read or play on the computer until 4 in the morning and then sleep until who knows what time?
I will dance with me to the rhythm of the 60's and 70's. And if later I want to cry remembering some life loss or pain...I will!
I'll walk down the beach in a swimsuit that stretches over my plump body and dive into the waves letting myself go, despite the pitying looks of the bikini-wearers. They'll get old too, if they're lucky...
It is true that through the years my heart has ached for the loss of a loved one, for the pain of a child, or for seeing a pet die. But it is suffering that gives us strength and makes us grow. An unbroken heart is sterile and will never know the happiness of being imperfect.
I am proud to have lived long enough for my hair to turn gray and to retain the smile of my youth, before the deep furrows appeared on my face.
Now, to answer the question honestly, I can say: -I like being old, because old age makes me wiser, freer!
I know I'm not going to live forever, but while I'm here, I'm going to live by my own laws, those of my heart.
I'm not going to regret what wasn't, nor worry about what will be.
The time that remains, I will simply love life as I did until today, the rest I leave to God.
Do not ask your children
to strive for extraordinary lives.
Such striving may seem admirable,
but it is the way of foolishness.
Help them instead to find the wonder
and the marvel of an ordinary life.
Show them the joy of tasting
tomatoes, apples and pears.
Show them how to cry
when pets and people die.
Show them the infinite pleasure
in the touch of a hand.
And make the ordinary come alive for them.
The extraordinary will take care of itself.
William Martin, The Parent's Tao Te Ching: Ancient Advice for Modern Parents
I can imagine that from your perspective, it must seem like some truly awful things happen in time and space. So, if you wouldn't mind, I'd like to weigh in.
You live in a world of illusions. A world that springs from a much deeper and far greater reality. And while at times the illusions are indeed ugly, with your physical senses you only see the tip of the iceberg. If you could see the whole, you'd discover that the unpleasantness was only the tiniest piece of a most spectacular puzzle that was created with order, intelligence, and absolute love. You'd see that contrary to appearances, in the grandest scheme of things, nothing is ever lost, no one becomes less, and setbacks are always temporary. And you'd understand that no matter what has happened, everyone lives again, everyone laughs again, and everyone loves again, even more richly than before.
Notes from the universe
Mike Dooley
